Seventeen weeks!

There are so many pieces of adoption. It's not just about "having a baby" or "adding a child". It's about joining lives that God ordained to be united. The reason for the need of adoption to happen is a sobering one. It is heart-breaking ... it is not "happily-ever-after". Some have symbolized the adoption process with pregnancy. While there are SO many similarities and symbolisms that can be made ...... there is one vast difference and from a momma's perspective, it's one of the most difficult during this time of unknown and waiting. When I was pregnant and "expecting" my first three children .... no matter all the unknowns or complications (I experienced several) ... I would always feel my tummy and know that all was well. I had something I could put my hand on, literally ... and "check-in" a thousand times a day or night, as only a mother would. During this "waiting" with adoption, there is nothing I can feel with my hand to know all is well. A child that is already so very much a part of my heart is out of my grasp ... a half world away ... surrounded by so many unknowns. They have already experienced loss in their little life that I have never known. While adoption is a miraculous thing, a beautiful thing, an absolutely wonderful thing ....... that's not all that it is. There's something in us as a parent that just wants to make everything better for our children. We want to soothe them, comfort them, give them a place to heal.

This verse in Habuakkuk brings much comfort during the season of waiting.

"But these things I plan won't happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, be patient! For it will surely take place. It will not be late by a single day." Habakkuk 2:3

I have NO control over anything that is about to happen in our lives. But I know the ONE who does. It is there I must find refuge ... it is the ONLY place I will find peace. If I do not rest there, I will lose my mind. The "what ifs" on this journey alone could cause you to need a major dose of prescriptions! :) When I find my mind drifting in a sea of unknowns, thrashing wildly about in the waves of fear .... I must, by mere obedience, let God take control of my thoughts. I must submit everything in me to His loving care.

So while we are thrilled beyond belief of the changes coming in our lives ..... we are also very much aware of the other sides of adoption. I believe this is what creates such an urgency in my spirit as a mom ..... to see my child with my own eyes and to know that with God's great love and healing .... all will be well.

You may not be facing the journey of adoption ... perhaps your life is on a far different journey all of it's own. No matter where you are, or what you're going through ... I encourage you to look to the ONE who has all things under His control. He can truly be our firm foundation and longs to lead us, if we'll only follow.