Three years, 8 months and 4 days ago I met this little one in a Houston, TX hospital. We'd waited what seemed like so long for her (we did not know babe would be HER, for the record!). :) As the holidays approached just before that, I'd grown so weary. My heart was feeling very faint, so sensitive to the needs of children who had no place to call home ... yet wondering why it was taking so long to get that call. During "the wait", we'd gone through a big health scare, which eventually led to surgery that was grueling for me to get over. All of these compiled has just worn me down. Well, shortly after the new year, we put in an email to the agency we were using to check in ... that prompted them to email us back with a special situation they had. A little girl, African American, 4 days old, about to undergo major heart surgery, no family available. We knew right away this was the child that God had been preparing us for. A little math and we realize God was relentless in calling us to obey him at the time of her conception. God is in the details, in case you've ever wondered. :)
So after having the absolute privilege of praying for her that day as she underwent surgery .... then hearing she made it through and was beginning the long road of recovery ... we made travel arrangements and soon I was on three different flights to get to her.
I'll never forget walking in that room. The huge sense of JOY from the Lord I had in knowing this is exactly where He'd led us ...... and the horrendous realization of just how alone she was. Here in America. She was still on a breathing machine, dialysis, and a host of other wires and gadgets ... yet those BIG brown eyes were WIDE open and met with mine as I walked up to her side. The nurses later told me I looked like a deer staring into headlights as I walked into the room. They were concerned something was unexpected to me. No ... I was just taking it all in.
I remember holding her little hand. Thoughts in my mind quickly drifted to her birthmom .... the amazing and brave woman who chose to give her life and not end it in a culture where it's so commonly accepted.
Well .... time has passed and now this spunky 'lil Texan is doing just great. We returned recently from our heart-doctor check up and she got a wonderful report! How grateful we are to God for protecting her, bringing healing through doctors to fix her heart and for giving us the JOY of watching her grow up.
We knew that children with heart conditions, such as hers could easily have "delays", or issues later on after some trauma after birth. But we also knew regardless of what lie ahead, we needed to be obedient and trust the Lord had a plan, no matter what it looked like to us. Those of you who know Naomi, know there are no delays. :) She is the spunkiest of all our children. She's witty and some days a challenge to "out smart". She asks me questions about her life that you expect an 8 or 10 yr old adoptee to ask.
Looking back I cannot imagine life without her. What if we'd not obeyed when God was drawing our hearts to feel the needs of orphans? What if we had listened only to "practical reasoning" and not trusting in the God who owns everything? What if we'd given into fear of issues regarding becoming a multi-ethnic family? For us, it was an issue of obedience. Would we trust God with EVERYTHING ....... every detail.
These days we're in a new season of trusting. Huge things like selling a home, embracing a new ministry, raising support during a questionable economy and a long list of others. We find ourselves wrestling with the big and the little. Do we really trust that God is good, no matter the circumstances we see? Do we really believe He has our best in mind? Will we be faithful to walk this journey, even when we only see a tiny glimpse at a time of what is ahead?
I have been so deeply challenged by Philippians 4:4-6 these last days. Not a new passage ... one that has brought hope and encouragement in times past. But these days it's bringing something different. It is challenging me in depths I've not been to in awhile. Perhaps, it might bring encouragement to you in your own life.
Let your gentleness be evident to all.
The Lord is near.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything,
by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,
will guard your hearts and your minds
in Christ Jesus.
So while we wait for God to reveal the details of the future, and answer the "unknowns", we look back and recount HIS FAITHFULNESS and praise Him. He is GOOD. He is ABLE. We must do our part and trust Him to do His.